photos // the craft (1994) + jawbreaker (1999) + mean girls (2004)
Sometimes recovery is waking up early to write in coffee shops and practicing yoga and eating lots of fruit and chocolate and sometimes it’s staying in bed all day and hiding from the world until you can stop crying. All of this is okay. What’s important is that you take care of yourself no matter what kind of day you’re having.
"Sometimes late at night
You can still feel the loneliness…like an animal in the dark, ready to pounce.
It can make a warm memory seem empty and unfamiliar.
Past things seem insignificant. And even faith can seem trivial.
Sometimes late at night you still feel the loneliness and you’ve learned that pain doesn’t give up that easily.
The dispair is an affliction of the godless.
You are in terrible danger unless you can recognize that your soul lives on long after death. It is the only thing that can save you…
And bring us together again.
I wish we could talk like we used to. But once you left you never came back.
It’s so hard being alone.
There’s always strangers at the door.
There’s so much I want to say to you
So much I need to explain
I waited so long for you to come back
I waited so long
Until I realized you never would
I wanted to talk to you, to tell you, that I’d made a mistake.
That you were more important to me than anything in the world. But I got confused.
That’s when I realized what I’d been trying to ignore, for so long. That you abandoned me. That my angel would no longer protect me.
And when faith is gone, loneliness can be a monster.
Do you miss me as much as I miss you?
I thought you would come to me then.
But you never did. The funeral was so empty without you.
Loneliness is worse now than it ever was, and all I can do now is remember the way you were. And make believe that you hoped the soul lives on long after death. Eternally, and without end. Make believe that you cared, make believe that you miss me as much as I miss you.”
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